A Day In The Life Of Ben Baumgarten

7:15 AM: My Mom wakes me up

7:20 AM: I stumble out of Bed and take a shower, I can’t get up right away because I sleep naked

8:00 AM: I hop in my car and drive down to Newport. On the way to work I think about how much my life sucks and try to figure where I went wrong. I usually drive by a bus stop and I feel a little better after that.

8:45 AM: I pop two addy’s and drink a large cup of black coffee in order to appear some what competent when I enter the office. Without my smart pills I don’t know what I would do.

9:15 AM: I walk in the office ready to work…..hahahah.. who am I kidding I’m never really ready to work.

9:15 AM -530 PM: I’m in office. I probably work about 25% of day. The rest of the time I spend in deep thought thinking about important things. Such as: why in the world was there a piece of poop in the ashtray at taco bell across the street where I eat? I also read the bible “The Wall Street Journal” which usually pisses me off reinforcing my Hatred for President Osama. I also spend a lot time on Facebook force feeding my blog down people’s throats. And I usually spend about an hour out of every work day resenting my mother for being Canadian, she just doesn’t understand why it sucks to be Canadian.

5:30Pm: I am done with work , wooohooo!!!! If I am feeling up to it, I go to the gym but that happens once in a blue moon. I have never seen a blue moon before…. Have you?

6:30 PM: I drive back to Pasadena, god life sucks…… I drive by a bus stop on the way home.

7:30PM: I eat what my mom calls dinner, but its not. She doesn’t work and she doesn’t cook what the hell does she do? Where the hell is bus stop when you need one? And why does she have to be Canadian seriously…. I am already Half Jewish. Now I get made fun of twice as much.

8:00 PM-11:00 PM: I spend most of my time in the “NPAZ”, the no parents allowed zone. That’s the room that is connected to my garage where my parents are not allowed to go and if they need to talk to me they signal me by flash light. The NPAZ is the only that keeps me from jumping off a bridge. Then I smoke till I pass out. God is my life exciting…..